Skillful Action: How to Meditate in Life and Play
And a couple things MBSR leaves out.
Hi friends! I’m Logan. Every couple of weeks, I share Dharma-inspired reflections for those navigating life at the margins.
I received a reader question about how my last post on speech relates to meditation. You’re welcome to reply to this email with your own questions, or tap the speech icon at the bottom to comment publicly.
Some people use phrases like, “empty” and “clear” your mind to describe meditation. I have no idea how to empty my mind and find this language not helpful in my personal practice.
Here’s my brief definition and distinction: meditation is the formal practice of befriending your mind, while mindfulness is meditating through day to day living.
Day to day living is pretty complex! That’s where the eightfold path can be handy. Each of the eight factors can be practiced individually, sort of (ultimately, they are interrelated).
For example, my last post on speech touched upon how language can shape sociopolitical identities. Making mindful/skillful speech your practice—tracking how you’re communicating—can be challenging…and really fruitful. Start where you are, try not to judge yourself, and keep going.
This post discusses how building toward an ethical life supports and motivates skillful action.
Key Points:
What MBSR omits: The Precepts and Why
Active Meditation: Walking and eating as meditation practices
Skillful Action in Daily Life: Mindfulness as meditating in daily life
Mindful Play: The Present: A mindful play approach for those at the margins
Takeaway Practice: Integrating the Precepts
What MBSR Omits: The Precepts
The Five Precepts are Buddhist ethical guidelines for lay (non-ordained) folks.
Secular mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) practices often deliver on their promise to reduce stress. After a 7-day retreat, many feel an empowered sense of spaciousness and agency. But how do we actually engage in mindful living? And agency to do what—work more effectively?
The precepts are one of many (if you haven’t yet observed) lists of “how” to achieve spiritual liberation which is, for present purposes, agency to choose your response regardless of stimulus.
While doctrinal translations tend to use “refrain from” language similar to the Old Testament Commandments (“thou shalt not”), I prefer more contemporary interpretations that focus on what we can cultivate. The five precepts for lay folks are
Promote life and its unfettered enjoyment
Promote sharing and generosity
Uplift and circulate wisdom
Maintain a clear mind
Honor relationships, sexual or otherwise
In The Wisdom of No Escape, Pema Chödrön emphasizes the distinction between understanding the concepts and living them.
For instance, you might know that the first precept is not to kill […] but the question really is, when the desire to kill something arises, why is it that you want to kill something?
What’s really going on there? And what would the benefit be of refraining from killing? What does refraining do? How do you feel when you refrain?
The effortless punk behind “well, how do you feel when you [verb]?” is what sold me on Buddhist practice. Try acting within the ethical precepts and see what happens. Over time, you’ll see the point isn’t just to sit, or cycle between frantic overwork and meditation retreats. Integration for the liberation of all beings is the goal.
To that integrative end, experienced meditators will know that there isn’t just sitting meditation. Active meditation is a step toward living mindfully.
Active Meditation
Formal meditation has included walking as a posture for millennia. Eating is another form of reflection and meditation.
There are four formal “postures” to meditate: sitting, standing, lying down, and walking.
Walking and movement are dynamic, meditative poses. What was previously “walking” posture is now often referenced as “movement,” to account for different bodies and abilities (and include practices like yoga, tai chi, and qi gong). In contrast to seated meditation, walking meditation asks you to stay focused and oriented, mindful of things like the back of your heel kissing the floor, the side of your foot making contact, the pressure on the ball of your foot as your heel begins to rise again, and finally, that toe thanking the earth before moving on. You might become aware of pace or of breath. This practice helps bring mindfulness into the simple act of walking, turning it into a meditative experience.
With each step: I am home // I have arrived.
Eating meditation is also a form of meditation. Eating—the slow, conscious, consumption of food—may include chewing a certain number of times, reflecting on the production process, and imagining the people, animals, plant life involved in getting that food into your belly. It’s a useful practice for thinking about impermanence and desire. Imagine a Chips Ahoy cookie after you’ve chewed it for a full two minutes. Or, better, do the exercise and report back.
These active meditative practices help us shift the balance toward mindfully doing other things. As meditation teacher Eugene Cash has said, bowling can be meditative. Archery can be meditative. Writing can be meditative; all of these are practices that can build toward spiritual integration and liberation.
As actions become even more complex, beyond things like walking, the precepts can be helpful guidelines.
Skillful Action in Daily life
While the eightfold path can be linear, it often isn’t. These qualities often develop together and randomly. The point is to begin and keep going.
When folks go on retreat, it’s common to get a “job.” You might be asked to clean the kitchen after a meal. This is meant to be a continuation of meditation practice: noting things like one’s body, one’s actions, one’s emotions as they arise, acting within and on behalf of community.
Outside of retreat life, skillful action can look like “leaning in” to a conversation that matters, repairing connections, advocating for your needs (PS, advocating for your needs is usually a generous act…for yourself and anyone else who would benefit down the line). Sometimes, skillful action is saying nothing. Sometimes, it’s walking away from a project.
Using that framework of the precepts, let’s pursue the latter example: walking away from a project. One could frame this as
Refraining from killing (the vibe) and, instead, promoting well-being for others
Promoting generosity: modeling self-mastery may inconvenience some, but circulating self-mastery helps all
Maintaining a clear mind by not partaking in things you know will cause you (and others) stress or un-ease
Acting agentially can be scary, because it can mean breaking a pattern.
That’s why I believe mindfulness practices around play can be helpful. Close readers (much metta and appreciation to you!) will know I do not mean “gaming.” Play is rooted in personal agency. Gaming usually involves competition and a win-state. Most people game to “win,” perhaps the game, perhaps money, perhaps social cred, not to play. Play doesn’t need a win-state because action is the reward.
As discussed in my skillful view post, play stretches imagination by purposefully promoting exploration. Stated differently, play can combat perfectionism, cycles of burnout and overwork, and urgent feelings to be “productive.” Whether group or solo, play gives room to see how you interface with rules, structure, and a need for there to “be a point.” Like with the Chips Ahoy cookie chewed for two minutes, at what point does play become a game become work? Watch how you act.
Play offers a rich sandbox to practice skillful action (and speech) in a dynamic setting.
Mindful Play: The Present
Mindful play can lead toward making meditation in daily life a more prominent feature in daily living.
My readers know childhood is a foundational time. As adults, a lot of us are thinking about how to replace habits we’ve lived with for decades. This is one of many reasons I choose play as a medium for us at the margins. A lot of us lost a lot of “playtime” early on. Still, now, today, we can be our own wildest dreams.
The goal of my game, The Present is to foster a dialogue between yourself now and yourself “then.” I wrote 32 prompts in a way accessible to your “younger self” (fingers crossed, open to feedback) to consider varied aspects of development like familial belonging, bodily change, friendships, loss, cultural difference, and joy. These are, of course, informed by my own history as a queer, transracial adoptee with two divorces in my adoptive home.
There are safety tools included, as well as a debrief section (guided reflection) for after each play session. What does proximity and size contrast tell you about what you learned about power and emotional intimacy? What lessons did you bestow on your younger self that you might benefit from today?
Readers can use this specific link to get a free copy of the game. You do need to sign up for the platform, unfortunately. If you claim a copy, please let me know what you think!
Importantly, this isn’t meant to be read. One could read it, just like one could read Romeo and Juliet…just know reading it is different from getting on stage as Juliet. Thinking about your unconscious is a philosophical exercise. Reading about the precepts is not the same as implementing them in your life.
The difference is embodied implementation. The difference is action.
Thank you, Jonathan, for giving me the opportunity to clarify how this all relates. I hope our exchange and this update helps. I’m open to other questions, comments, concerns, compliments (🤗) as you have them!
Takeaway Practice
As you go about your day, try keeping the precepts in mind. Perhaps start with one—like promoting generosity—and observe how your actions align with this principle. Reflect: How did this focus influence your interactions and decisions?
Promote life and its unfettered enjoyment
Promote sharing and generosity
Uplift and share wisdom
Maintain a clear mind
Honor relationships, sexual or otherwise
Remember, especially in relation to things like generosity, you count, too.
Reminders
Creative Coalition: September 1
The Creative Coalition centers mindful play and respectful engagement. The goal is to leave feeling challenged, refreshed, and inspired to innovate beyond this space.
On September 1st, from 4-6 PST, the Creative Coalition will continue with Takuma Okada’s writing/drawing game, Alone In The Ancient City.
Feedback from August: "At first, I was overwhelmed and confused by the mix of structure and freedom. But as we got into 'play,' I realized how empowering this space was. [We] created a space to be creative and stress-free."
Here’s the sign-up link and a time zone converter!
Adoptee Alchemy: September 15
Adoptee Alchemy offers adoptee meditators a safe space to discuss engaged mindfulness. No experience is required to join.
On September 15th, from 4-5:15 PST, the Adoptee Alchemists will gather to discuss equanimity and emotional regulation. Please note that this is 15 minutes longer than the other times we’ve met to account for any lingering discussion.
Feedback from August: "It's always great to take time to sit, and i really liked the visualization of lighting up the spaces in between."
Bio
Logan Juliano, PhD (they/them) is a mindful integration mentor offering 1:1 sessions and group workshops. They currently teach writing at the University of California, Los Angeles and hold an PhD in Performance Studies.